Plan 4 my life

It´s a little bit complicated to descripe, I ever searched for a plan, or call it way in my life. I don´t know if I found one.
When I was under 20, I do an education, it was so terrible. My parents, specially my mother want that, it was the idea of my "stepvather" to choose that way.
I feel craped. What can I do ?
I began to produce big songs in the age of 14 with my friend Boris, formaly Sonnenlach. That was an escape, also for Boris, whos parents are also divorced. We were lost this time. Our music gave us save.
So after my education I escaped from home to a sick girlfriend of my mother. She takes morphin all the day. You know what I mean ?
This is the first time I write that down. This person is very sick. All persons I know that time gave me the feel of a drama.
For a short time, I lived at my grandpa, mother side, he was a big business man.
He gave me tips for my live. He turns my 180 degrees. He smells like money.
In my hole life to that point I don´t realy know who he is.
How strange is that ?
Later I´ve got my own first appartment, this was a big school.
I felt very unstable also this time. In the age of 23 I start my own digital label after many escapads. I want to do it now.
I felt better that time, I want that for sure.
But earning money with that was far away. Realy.
I always has to do jobs, job by job, ba ba ba.
I just want to do music for my living.
That sick jobs give me the feel of no plan.
How can I reach bigger stages ?
The lifes of my parents are, in financial sight, destroyed and they´ve got no power anymore to change something. They loose their love because of business life day by day, which crashed. They are both artists in their heart.
That´s the reason why I hate money.